Marriage, divorce, and relationship with a Copt.

I received an email recently where a woman asked whether it is possible to have a relationship with a Copt in Egypt who is separated from his wife but does not want a divorce.

For those who do not know, a Copt is an Egyptian Orthodox Christian. Btw, Christians represent around 10% of the Egyptian population. Around 90% of them belong to the Coptic Orthodox Church. The remaining 10% are divided between the Coptic Catholic and the Coptic Protestant churches (https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/geos/eg.html).

Civil marriage and divorce are regulated in Egypt by the Family law. In addition, the Coptic Church has a separate set of bylaws regarding both marriage and divorce, which were set in 1938.

Recently the Church increased the number of reasons for divorce from two to three:
- adultery,
- undisclosed pre-existing terminal illness,
- and change of religion.

Importantly that the Coptic Church issues annulment of marriages not divorces. Another problem is that while a Christian may be able to obtain civil divorce, this divorce may not be recognized by the Church (if the reason for divorce does not fall into the three above). Egypt's Coptic religious leader Pope Shenouda III said that the ruling of an Egyptian court obliging the church to acknowledge a man's right to remarry after he obtained a civil divorce is not binding.

"We only abide by the Bible. We cannot betray our principles and do something that is forbidden in our holy book. The court ruling is civil and not religious" (http://www.alarabiya.net/articles/2008/03/04/46471.html )

In case of adultery and consequent divorce recognized by the church, "the party that committed adultery is not allowed to re-marry while the victim is granted this right." Thus, the church cannot marry a divorcee for reasons other than adultery, and any minister who does that will be excommunicated," Pope Shenouda said.

What shall people do with such a rigid church’ stance? Many accepted these restrictions on divorce and are reluctant even to raise the issue of divorce in attempt to protect their families including parents and children from embarrassment. Some lead a double life. Some Christians temporarily convert to Islam in order to get divorced and remarry.

It is not my place here to judge anyone. But it seems that any relationship with a Coptic man can bring more troubles to both than joy. Unfortunately…